The dating cure by rhonda findling dating asian women in new zealand
A telltale sign of a Malignant Man — he is usually unaware of, in denial of, or just won’t acknowledge his relationally destructive behavior, no matter how unhappy he is or his obvious lack of successful relationships. They can be irresistible, interesting, talented, brilliant, captivating, sexy, attentive, engaging, fun, promising, sweet, supportive, lovable, paternal and loving.
He is usually locked into his own subjective reality and often finds any feedback on his way of thinking about relationships as a personal attack. The tragedy is that these healthy characteristics are only parts of them.
If you’ve ever known a man who was the sweetest nicest guy in the whole world but ended up sabotaging or destroying the connection once you tried to bump it up a notch, then you’ve had an encounter with a Malignant Man.
By saying or doing something that ruins your relationship.
Eventually you do something to disappoint him or he finds something imperfect about you and you’re thrown off the pedestal.
Plays Warped Psychological Games Sometimes he plays twisted psychological games, which provide interaction and drama, but are a poor substitute for intimacy.
Often he doesn’t have the relationship skills to try and fix it.
He’s Smug Or Arrogant His smugness is off the chart.
If you’ve ever had a connection with a man who totally confused you with double messages, then you’ve been with a Malignant Man.Wants To Be Mysterious Wanting to be known is avoided and real relating is obviated. Complicated You often find yourself processing his behavior and your relationship with people in your support system. This emotionally abusive dynamic is commonly known in the pop psychology/recovery world as “gaslighting” and refers to the classic 1944 film Gaslight, where a wife, eager for her abusive husband’s approval, believes his reality over hers until she starts to lose her mind. It’s easy to fall in love with a man who’s mysterious because you build him up into a fantasy and idealize him. He Can Act Outrageously Obnoxious He can be combative, argumentative, critical, offensive, rude, dismissive and/or a know-it-all. He prevents real contact from being made by using various methods of distancing and evasion, which I will explore in more detail later. It’s when you get close and more intimately involved (not necessarily sexually) with Malignant Men their destructive, hurtful behavior becomes activated.A woman doesn’t have to do anything to trigger his intimacy problems. Claire Bloom’s description of her ex-husband, the famous author Phillip Roth, in her memoir Leaving A Doll’s House beautifully captures the essence of a Malignant Man: The following are descriptions of Malignant Men’s behaviors. Two behavior traits — he’s probably a Malignant Man.