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As you get stronger (and tighter), do more reps and hold each one longer. If you’re not yet in the hot flash phase, look at your meds.

“For a very large percentage of my clients, it’s that simple.

Only about 30% of women orgasm without clitoral stimulation, says licensed psychologist Laurie Mintz, Ph D.

So if sex for you doesn’t directly involve your clit—either with manual stimulation or via sexual positions that hit it (woman-on-top often does)—coming isn’t going to be in the cards.

Kerner’s book is designed to boost a guy’s “sexual clitoracy.” “Most guys are utterly i-clitorate,” says Kerner, a New York City-based sex therapist. You’re working muscles to make them taut, in this case the muscles of your pelvic floor, including your vagina.

"There are clinics in France for this express purpose—what they call a reeducation perineale,” says Brizendine.

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