I was dating a married man

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Can I just have the occasional fling or a casual affair? If I asked her that kind of question, it would kill her.”“So you don’t want to hurt her, but you lie to her instead.

Personally, I’d rather know.”Well, I would rather know.

The only difference being that he's married to someone else! We were part of the same team, working under the same snooty boss. He was dating someone and I was in a relationship too. Not every relationship is meant for society's understanding and approval. Sometimes, two people don't get married even though they're in love.

But what started as a 'few drinks' turned into a shot too many. We've made peace with our situation and accepted our unusual circumstances. I don't expect anyone to believe that what we share is actually true love.

We're both working professionals, climbing the ladder of success. As bitching sessions got more frequent and coffee breaks became routine, we didn't even realise when we became friends. Some years passed and we moved to different organisations. Not every relationship leads to marriage and babies. But it doesn't mean they should let go of their love, right?

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Then, at menopause, a woman’s hormones suddenly drop and her desire can wane.

They both, to some degree, got what they needed without having to give up what they wanted.

But the other husbands I met would have preferred to be having sex with their wives. I know what it feels like to go off sex, and I know what it’s like to want more than my partner.

I know I did, which is what led me down this path of illicit encounters.

After all, nearly as many women are initiating affairs as men. Meanwhile, the husbands I spent time with would have been fine with obligatory sex.

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