Girls guide to dating zombies

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A commonly suggested technique advised silently moving your partner’s finger to the prescribed place.

This method allowed you to avoid a potentially humiliating conversation.

This sort of discretion is unnecessary with a zombie.

You can move him into any position you’d like without mortification.

Much to her surprise she stumbles upon a real, live man. While I loved the theme, the storyline was predictable at times.

But for a quick read that’s out of left field I highly recommend it.

But once you make it known to them, they’re able to apply themselves accordingly for as long as you require. There’s none of the embarrassment reportedly attached to showing an unzombified human male where it is.

According to women’s magazines from the latter half of the twentieth century, few things were more awkward than telling a partner where the clitoris is.

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You’d have to be dead five days yourself before you’d even consider going to the movies with a decomposing corpse. Roughly 300,000 unzombified human males left on the planet and I’d somehow bump into one in line at the supermarket. Well, now you can: LOVE IN THE TIME OF ZOMBIES, my new tell-all soon to be released from Shebooks, gives all the gritty details of my transformation from zombie hater to zombie lover. Wince as I try to break into a secret government facility! Because that’s what the love bubble does—makes you oblivious to everything but your love. The obvious explanation for this imbalance is anatomical: If your zombie boyfriend were to give you a hand with the door, he might actually give you a hand.Your zombie boyfriend won’t mind because he doesn’t have one.And while you’re savoring the results of a successful hunting expedition, don’t forget to check out Zombies!A zombie’s permanent state of decay means a seemingly harmless tumble on a Flexible Flyer can result in an inconvenient amputation or disfiguring scar (aw, but you’ll love him anyway! Even light boogie boards pose a risk: The rope used to pull it up the hill has been known to cause unexpected decapitations when not handled proper (i.e., by you). To be fair, skies are a lot less harmful to your rottie hottie than a sled. Look for LOVE IN THE TIME OF ZOMBIES later this month.Zomb Sports’ new hip boots made of space-age polymers provide the extra support your zombie needs to balance on two skies. Instead, cozy up in the lodge for hot chocolate and some quality canoodling. Just how much shoveling fun your boyzomb has depends on your goal. Tags: communication, conventional wisdom, coupledom, exciting story, growth moments, happy couples, Love in the Time of Zombies, Netflix, new information, plague, prequel, responsible behavior, rottie hottie, surprises, tell-all, the truth, zombie dating, zombie-dating secrets, zombies You don’t have to tell me about the giddy exuberance of a new romance.

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