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In the past I have made room for the discomfort of strangers who do not want to date someone with an STI.You need to do what’s right for you and your health, I reassured and soothed my readers, not wanting to ruffle feathers, not wanting to seem extreme.Sometimes the question is esoteric, about whether or not he truly knew this woman in the first place. You’ve never given herpes any serious thought before and here I am, a woman with herpes and a blog, who has so generously spilled her guts to the Internet about what it’s like.And sometimes it’s the classic entitled bullshit I face on Twitter all the time: I’m not a jerk for dumping someone who poses a risk to my health, right? It’s just a simple question to you: should I date this person, yes or no?My first outbreak was quite painful because it coincided with an infected spider bite, but now I show symptoms so rarely that I pose no credible risk to my partners 99% of the time.In retrospect, if my ex-boyfriend had known he had herpes and told me before we started dating, I wouldn’t have done anything differently, and I would still have herpes today.We assure you, you will be more than satisfied in our exclusive community only for people with STDs.We've made it possible for you to meet other people with an STD who are more than eager to get in touch with you.

I have little to no interest in being with someone who doesn’t think I’m worth getting herpes from. If you are not willing to brave the risk of getting herpes, you are not worth my time.If my STI is a deal breaker for you, your ignorance and cowardice is a deal breaker for me.One of the most romantic moments of my life was when an old partner told me that I had so thoroughly de-stigmatized herpes for him that he saw contracting from me as an inevitability he chose, rather than a nightmare I should have panic attacks over (and although I continued to have said panic attacks, I never did transmit to him).They considered me as a full person, not the “side-effects” of having feelings for me.When it came down to the brass tacks of who I am, there was no decision to be made at all.

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