Christian dating and marriage advice fat granny dating
After talking with one couple recently I realised that there are some questions people don’t think about asking each other unless prompted. ’ Last Friday I found myself, unusually, with nothing to do.
‘I connected with a nice guy online, we met up a few times, and he seemed keen to pursue a relationship,’ said the email. For a few weeks, he’ll be enthusiastic and romantic and talk about the future… It’s a rare treat in a busy London life, but the thought did flit through my mind ‘I wonder if anyone wants to come over…’ I couldn’t really be bothered to come up with a plan, though, so I just stayed in and watched TV. ‘I’m too old for the singles group and too young for the seniors…’ ‘I don’t fit into the women’s ministry because I don’t have a husband or kids…’ ‘All the groups in our church focus on families…’ ‘I just can’t seem to fit in…’ Your church should, in theory, be the ideal place to meet your future spouse.
A good marriage counselor will force you to do this by finding those areas and poking at them a bit, but you should make an effort on your own to address issues that you know exist. In my view, much less of your engagement should be spent planning the wedding than preparing for marriage, but obviously you will spend some time talking about this. A wedding is not primarily about the two people getting married.
In addition to possibly working through some of those issues early on, the exercise will enhance your communication skills. It is not primarily the bride’s special day (though it will unquestionably be a special day for her), and it is not primarily the groom’s rite of passage into Christian manhood (though in some ways it is that as well).
A wedding is a worship service in which two people happen to get married. At the end of the regular Sunday morning service, the two people getting married would either come down to the front of the church or simply stand where they were and take their vows.
As you plan the music, preaching and other aspects of your wedding service, keep in mind that it is ultimately an event of worship before God.
I advise that you keep it simple (even humble), and keep it worshipful.
You don’t need to talk about it constantly as a couple, and you don’t need to do an in depth study of Song of Solomon with your fiancé two months before your wedding.
For more ideas on this, see “How can I prepare for our wedding night in a God-honoring way? This is important: Don’t buy into the secular myth that you are somehow inferior or failing your new spouse if you don’t show up as a sexual expert on the night of your wedding. If you are already a sexual expert on the night of your wedding, then you have, somewhere along the way, blatantly strayed from God’s design for sexuality in your life. Get solid, biblical marriage counseling, either from the pastor who will conduct the wedding service or from some other person who is mature in the faith and in marriage.