Being courted dating
Furthermore, there is vast individual variation between couples.
Courtship may be completely omitted, as in cases of some arranged marriages where the couple do not meet before the wedding.
In addition, it can be hard to find the “real” person behind the public face presented in front of the entire family.
No one is the same in a group setting as he or she is one-on-one.
While there are non-Christians who date with the intention of having a series of intimate physical relationships, for the Christian this is not acceptable and should never be the reason for dating.
Many Christians see dating as little more than friendship and maintain the friendship aspect of their dating until both people are ready to commit to each other as potential marriage partners.
If a couple is never alone together, they never have that one-on-one opportunity to relate and get to know one another in emotional and spiritual intimacy.
In addition, some courtship situations have led to borderline “arranged marriages” by the parents and have resulted in resentment in one or both of the young people.
Are we supposed to be actively looking for a spouse?
Of course, the courtship style presents its own set of difficulties.
While many courtship advocates see it as the only choice for finding a mate, others find it oppressive and overly controlling.
Courtship advocates claim that courtship allows for the two people to truly get to know each other in a more platonic setting without the pressures of physical intimacy or emotions clouding their view. For daters, spending time alone with a member of the opposite sex whom we find attractive can present temptations that can be very hard to resist.
The Christian dating couple must have boundaries in place and be committed to not crossing them.